What Is Not Spoken: As a couples’ therapist I am accustomed to learning from my patients that they have not experienced sexual intimacy for months or years leading up to their visits with me. Numbers of years. What is equally significant is the common admission that paralleling the absence of physical contact has been the […]
Jill Edelman
The Red Couch Is A Year Old: 8-9-12
Written by Jill Edelman M.S.W., L.C.S.W.The Red Couch Is A Year Old: The Ability Beyond Disability services manager, mover and shaker of our daughter’s residential component, invited the two moms and the residential staff to lunch to mark a year since the ladies moved into their cozy duplex/CRS (Continuous Residential Support) on August 1 in Ridgefield, Connecticut. The atmosphere and […]
No, You Are The Problem: Finger Pointing in The Coupledom
Written by Jill Edelman M.S.W., L.C.S.W.Easy Enough: Is there anything easier, almost at any age, than pointing your finger at someone? Towards the end of the first year of life, most babies are pointing at something. And in our final days, feeble though we may be, we still have point-ability. No wonder we stay attached to this skill: it is […]
What Can We Learn From Katie Holmes? Don’t Stop Thinking About Tomorrow
Written by Jill Edelman M.S.W., L.C.S.W.Katie Holmes: What can we learn from Katie? She is clearly a girl who never stopped thinking about tomorrow. She married a big star, apparently with an ironclad prenup that didn’t rust, and she never gave up her day job. Though some might question the Katie Holmes reference, I am using her to make a point. […]
Personalize This! The Coupledom’s Achilles Heel
Written by Jill Edelman M.S.W., L.C.S.W.The Common Malady: In human interaction, and this may be a character trait unique to our species, there is a tendency to perceive the behaviors and verbalization of others in personal terms, understood as reflecting an attitude, belief or feeling that is about “me”, because of me, or in relationship to me. This tendency of […]
The Busy Life Of A Special Needs Adult: 6-25-12
Written by Jill Edelman M.S.W., L.C.S.W.Swimmingly: In the last six weeks our daughter’s special needs adult life has been going along swimmingly, pun intended. She participated in Connecticut’s Special Olympics aquatic state finals, including spending two nights in a Southern Connecticut State University dormitory. She received a medal for her excellent riding (her “seat” as they call it) at the […]
I Don’t Want To Lose My Children
Written by Jill Edelman M.S.W., L.C.S.W.Father’s Day: A Sunday devoted to dad is coming up shortly and my clinical mind scans through father files looking for relevant information. Strangely, one oft-repeated phrase leaps out at me; “I don’t want to lose my children” – something that many fathers have said in my office when facing the possibility of a divorce. […]
The Coupledom Ambles Towards Seniorhood
Written by Jill Edelman M.S.W., L.C.S.W.A Road Trip To The Future: My Coupledom has recently aged out of its “middle years” and into early Seniorhood. And we are hardly alone as we join the ranks of baby boomers who over the next two decades will be marching forth to take their seat at the table of ultimate maturity. The announcement […]
Mom, I Know I Was Born With Eggs: Parenting Adult Special Needs One Month At A Time
Written by Jill Edelman M.S.W., L.C.S.W.Checking In: More than six weeks have gone by since I last posted on our daughter’s adult special needs life, and a busy six weeks indeed. During that time our twenty-two-year old daughter started a new volunteer job at Best Friends in Norwalk, an animal daycare and grooming center, and continued her two other vocational […]
A Smart Mother’s Day for The Coupledom
Written by Jill Edelman M.S.W., L.C.S.W.Your Mother, Her Day: Mother’s Day is coming and the material world is busy reminding us to commemorate our mothers with flowers, jewelry, breakfast in bed, and dinner out at a special restaurant. Though this tradition of honoring motherhood has ancient roots, the current version began in 1907 when Ana Jarvis, desirous to honor her […]