Differences


How Smart Is Humor: 9-10-11

A Necessary Balance: I had to cancel our UGGS (boots) shopping yesterday. Rescheduled for next Saturday due to a previous commitment to my husband to head down to Cape May Point, New Jersey if the weather were good. And so it was. Our daughter handled the delay well but I didn’t. I felt that I […]

Skunked And Bumped: 8-31-11

Home At Last: At 3 P.M. yesterday our daughter called, joyful the power was on in her Ridgefield apartment so the gal was going home. Whew! Now that was timely, as our son had reached me moments earlier from our house to say our generator was “fried.” Darn, the guys were right, keeping it on […]

A Very Social Storm: 8-28-11

We Bailed: The vote was unanimous, five in favor of boarding the 1:30 ferry yesterday bound for Bridgeport, Connecticut, a smooth crossing indeed. After stops for food, including a local farm replete in pigs, blueberries and an amazing flax seed bread, we reached home. Our son made his original wheat berry beef stew, inviting his […]

Pregnant, Tired Or Fired? Nope Just Gone: 8-12-11

Irony, Life’s Theme Song: I just reread the last paragraph in my 8-8-11 post. The paragraph started with the topic: “I Love This Coach” and ended with a silent prayer. I think you get my drift already. Yes, the coach is gone, poof, as of yesterday. No kidding. Neither pregnant, tired nor fired, she just left. […]

The Coupledom Contract: Who Gets Thrown Under The Bus?

The Costs Of Accommodation: There are many unspoken and even unconscious clauses in most Coupledoms. They may include never confronting your partner with the reality of their tone-deaf singing or limited grace on the dance floor. Perhaps the overcooked spaghetti goes unmentioned, or the gardening attempts that are less than stellar. None of these accommodations […]

Stereotyping The Coupledom

Stereotyping Your Partner: One marvels at the power of gender stereotyping in The Coupledom, that domicile in which the relationship resides. Years, even decades into a marriage, partners interpret behaviors in the language of expected gender norms. Often these interpretations are inaccurate and create emotional distance rather than facilitate connectedness. Dismissive or Disengaged? At the […]

The Secret To A Happy Marriage: Self-Expansion

A Tip To Start The Coupledom Off On The Right Foot in 2011: The sum of one partner part plus one partner part equals two partner parts: No! Not if you follow the research. In fact, as mentioned in previous posts, optimal bonding in The Coupledom should lead to a much greater, broader entity…the combined […]

Is Our Child Gay? The Coupledom Grapples With “Difference”

A Child Is Lost: I had already begun to draft this post with the focus on parents faced with questions regarding their developing child’s gender preferences when the news of a suicide at Rutgers University made the headlines. This post is dedicated to the memory of Tyler Clementi and all the youngsters who fall beneath […]

How to Accept and Enjoy Differences

Couples often are strikingly bewildered by their partner’s inability to feel what they feel and act as they do. It does not easily compute that this person, with whom I have chosen to spend my time, thinks so differently and behaves so “unlike me.” And the “unlike me” is the operative word here. The human […]