Toolkit of New Years Vows for 2016

Photo of couple looking into each others eyes for The Couples Tool Kit blog post on New Years Vows for 2016_Credit - Stockbyte.

New Years Vows 2016: Each Day

1. Each Day I will wonder about you – how are you doing? How was your day? And each day I will take a moment to ask you. And each day I will actually listen to your answer.

2. Each Day I will tell you the truth. Each day I will undo a lie or omission from the day before. Each day I will remember that telling the truth takes a lot less time and causes a lot less damage than lying, avoiding or denying. Each Day.

3. Each Day you and I will play, share a joke, watch a show – just a flash of humor, each day. To remember we can play.

4. Each Day I will take a moment out to hold your hand or look into your eyes or kiss your lips or touch your cheek. Each day to remind myself that you are real too.

5. Each Day I vow that I will not let others define our relationship – turn our dyad into a triangle. Each day I will strive to make our unit the strong unit – the “to go to” unit – to strengthen ourselves within our Coupledom.

6. Each Day I will remember that one day I may lose you. So each day I will recall that you are my companion, my partner and my best friend. Even if each day isn’t always the same – some days I like you better than other days. Still.

Six Vows. Not too many. Just enough. Happy New Year Coupledom 2016.

@Jill Edelman, M.S.W., L.C.S.W. 2015

7 Responses to “Toolkit of New Years Vows for 2016”

  1. kim

    Tonight at “midnight” I’m going to read these vows to my husband and ask that he read them back to me. Understanding the importance of each one can take a long time for some (me) but with continued work and peeling off of layers it is a journey needed to thrive as a couple, and life as a thriving couple doesn’t get better. And thriving on a daily basis, how cool is that. Might seem obvious to some but for those who didn’t practice the vows and now do it is like being reborn.

    I might even have these vows framed. Happy New Year, may 2016 and beyond be filled with the joy we all deserve in our coupledom.

  2. Karen Orzack-Moore

    Dear Jilly,

    I like this and these are good vows-promises to remember to tell myself and to tell my loved one.

    I also decided last night that it was important to speak in a positive way–to say more frequently and to get into the habit of saying, “This is a good thing. This sounds great,” of course, not without authenticity, even about the smallest things to a loved one rather than finding the flaw or difficulty.

  3. kim

    So powerful and yet so simple. As planned my husband and I did exchange vows over a spectacular dinner. I think as we each read them to each other they struck a chord, all six of them, for both of us. Thank you, what a perfect way to ring in the new year!


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